I have decided to donate my sperm assuming I pass the criteria at the local licenced clinic.
Why? I was recently married - not entirely happily, but I assumed that the rough patches would give way to nicer patches and overall, as time went by - a calm settlement between me and my wife. We had actually made the decision to try for a baby. But then, perhaps due to this decision, she decided she wanted a divorce.
We're currently separated for 10 months now. I am concious that had things remained as they where, perhaps I would be a dad by now. And feel that theoretical loss along with everything else.
I find myself in a relationship with a beautiful sexy woman, and life is good - only she can have no more children for health reasons - she has one son. This means, I find myself being like a father figure, which is emotionally highly fulfilling. as human beings, we're all quite nurturing. But although there may in time be a transfer of wisdom and knowledge from me, to her son, it will never be fulfilling the genetic imperative. And will make me want to break the relationship eventually. Yet I do rather like this woman.
So I've wondered about trade off solution. I donate my sperm, and my progeny continues to couples who really want a child too, and that child will be very likely well loved and cared for. Likewise, I will do the same, and perhaps adopt with this new girlfriend.
If I do this, if we are able to adopt, then there will be fareness and fulfilment alround:
1) her son is genetically to me not valid, but as a human being of course, wonderful.
2) if we adopt, she too is not connected to this human being and we share that common altruism.
3) my genes do get to be passed on, via sperm donation.
So all in all, the amount of love in the trade offs and gains seems to magnify and it seems from all points of view, everybody benefits including the adopted child, the new children of mine raised by other kind loving people, and for me and my girlfriend a bigger, happier more fulfilled family.